CONTEXT: Brenda Brooks is a snooty librarian who believes that fantasy novels are a complete waste of time. In this scene, she tells a young visitor how she plans to re-organize the library.
BRENDA:
Young man, I am very busy. Would you
please take your gawking eyes and your
bubble-gum belabored jaws elsewhere? When
you return next week, you’ll find some
significant changes have been made.
As the new librarian, I have been placed
in charge of reorganization and redistribution.
And in the process I am removing a few
unnecessary novels. Too much fantasy and
folly can spoil a child’s mind. This library
needs more science and less Dr. Seuss.
More history and less Hogwarts. Children
need academics and not adventures. One
doesn’t get into a university by studying
unicorns. Take this one for example.
“Treasure Island!” It’s a loathsome tale
of filthy dirty pirates. Certainly not
a book for respectable students. And
what about this one? “James and the
Giant Peach”? Preposterous. Even with
modern agricultural techniques, fruit
simply cannot grow to that extreme size.
Silly, silly stuff. Guaranteed to
warp young minds. Now shoo!
